They stole 300€ while I was in the toilet.

So… I give this brothel a full 5 out of 5 stars. The decor? Retro meets Reeperbahn – between pink faux leather and flickering lights, you feel like you're in Grandma's brothel fantasy from '79. The ladies? A mix of 'Germany's Next Top Model' and 'Battle of the Reality Stars' – entertaining, flexible, and easily excitable. Especially 'Sandy 3000,' who not only put my heart back in place but also my back – chiropractic with a happy ending, I tell you. Service? I booked the 'All-Inclusive, Don't-Worry Express.' 30 minutes of pure wellness, including dirty talk in three languages, and a finish that even the German Technical Inspection Association (TÜV) would classify as potentially explosive. Only downside: The carpet is sticky. But hey – anyone who complains about hygiene in a brothel is probably the same type who asks for a towel during a gangbang. Conclusion: I came, I saw, and… I came again. I would go again. Even for no particular reason. Or with back pain.

Very nice service. I'd come more often, but unfortunately my wife is against it. I would come more often anyway. I'm initiating a separation soon.

Absolutely terrible, I can't recommend it at all, stay away. I would never go there again. Completely disappointed...😪😪😪

I'd love to come in sometime!