Be Privileged curates exclusive events for couples and single ladies who want the erotic-lifestyle world with a great deal of polish on it. Its own description is precise about the audience: young, good-looking, like-minded couples and women, in luxurious surroundings at secret locations across the Netherlands and Belgium, for members and invitees who appreciate indulging in an erotic lifestyle with style and sophistication.

It began in 2010 as a small private gathering for friends and has grown into a community the organisers put at more than 12,000 members. Scale has not changed the format: three events a year, four at most, each one a takeover of a venue that would otherwise never host this kind of evening — a five-star hotel, a historic sanctuary, a castle. The location is deliberately kept secret and revealed only to ticket holders, usually a few days ahead in a personal information letter that also covers parking and house rules.

Access is the other half of the concept. It is a private membership community: membership is free but vetted, with face and full-body photographs required, and only verified members can buy. Single men are not admitted at all; couples and single ladies are, and members may bring guests subject to approval. Because the events are run as closed private gatherings rather than public parties, the guest list is genuinely a list.

The house rules are as clear as the dress code. Sex is not permitted at Be Privileged events — this is a stylish erotic night rather than a play party — consent is stated bluntly as no means no, and phone photography is banned in favour of a resident photographer. Dress is elegant: black tie or a suit for men, elegant lingerie for women, with the exact brief emailed per event. Editions typically pair the party with a chef's dining experience and rooms in the venue itself. Browse EroticAdvisor for the next Be Privileged edition, its city and what is included.